strangereality163
07.13.07 (1:30 pm) [edit]
This one is all about murder, and how to get away with it.
I was running a few minutes late for work and walking quickly along the pavement toward the bus stop a few hundred yards away. Two young women were walking towards me. The pavement was just wide enough for three people. I moved to the outside. The busy road traffic whizzed by just a few feet to my left. As the two ladies passed me on the inside, the nearer one's t-shirt brushed my shirt. I looked down: my feet were on the kerb. Then we were past each other, I moved back to the middle of the pavement, and I caught the bus and went to work.
A pretty unremarkable anecdote, even by my low standards. What interests me about it is the following. It occurred to me that it would have been perfectly possible for the girl to have given me a slight shove as we passed. She could easily have murdered me with no effort or planning whatsoever – and easily got away with it, too.
I would have lost my balance and toppled out into the road and into the path of the oncoming traffic. No driver would have been able to react and stop in time. It was a busy main road and the cars, vans, and trucks were motoring along at a fair old lick. They were less than three feet away from me. The wheels would have pulped my head like an egg and crunched up my body within a couple of seconds. Perhaps multiple vehicles would have made a meal of me. First a delivery truck, to snap my ribcage and crush my skull; then a couple of cars to pass me through the wringer a few more times, just to make sure.
After the event, with me safely dead and beyond all ability to testify, the young lady would have had no case to answer to the authorities. It would be put down as just an awful accident.
Even if anybody passing by elsewhere in the street, or in the passing vehicles, had just happened to have their eyes on the three of us as we passed each other, and noticed the slight shove that she gave me to make me lose my balance, she could always claim that there was no contact at all and the observer was mistaken due to their distance and their angle of view, or that any contact was minimal and accidental and oh my god this is so dreadful that poor man I feel so guilty – et cetera. At the very, very worst, the young lady could say that she had simply stumbled, and it was all very unfortunate.
It follows from this imaginary excursion into a gruesome kind of random death that the ideal place to murder somebody - and get away with it - is whilst walking along a pavement next to a busy road. A stranger, walking towards you, has stepped to the outer side to let you pass. Just give him, or her, a gentle shove with your shoulder – or a hefty shove, it makes no difference really (you'll get away with it either way) – and stand back in 'horror' as the tragedy ensues.
Of course, it follows from this that it could happen to you, at any time. Always pass people on the inside, is my advice.
Don't have nightmares.
I was running a few minutes late for work and walking quickly along the pavement toward the bus stop a few hundred yards away. Two young women were walking towards me. The pavement was just wide enough for three people. I moved to the outside. The busy road traffic whizzed by just a few feet to my left. As the two ladies passed me on the inside, the nearer one's t-shirt brushed my shirt. I looked down: my feet were on the kerb. Then we were past each other, I moved back to the middle of the pavement, and I caught the bus and went to work.
A pretty unremarkable anecdote, even by my low standards. What interests me about it is the following. It occurred to me that it would have been perfectly possible for the girl to have given me a slight shove as we passed. She could easily have murdered me with no effort or planning whatsoever – and easily got away with it, too.
I would have lost my balance and toppled out into the road and into the path of the oncoming traffic. No driver would have been able to react and stop in time. It was a busy main road and the cars, vans, and trucks were motoring along at a fair old lick. They were less than three feet away from me. The wheels would have pulped my head like an egg and crunched up my body within a couple of seconds. Perhaps multiple vehicles would have made a meal of me. First a delivery truck, to snap my ribcage and crush my skull; then a couple of cars to pass me through the wringer a few more times, just to make sure.
After the event, with me safely dead and beyond all ability to testify, the young lady would have had no case to answer to the authorities. It would be put down as just an awful accident.
Even if anybody passing by elsewhere in the street, or in the passing vehicles, had just happened to have their eyes on the three of us as we passed each other, and noticed the slight shove that she gave me to make me lose my balance, she could always claim that there was no contact at all and the observer was mistaken due to their distance and their angle of view, or that any contact was minimal and accidental and oh my god this is so dreadful that poor man I feel so guilty – et cetera. At the very, very worst, the young lady could say that she had simply stumbled, and it was all very unfortunate.
It follows from this imaginary excursion into a gruesome kind of random death that the ideal place to murder somebody - and get away with it - is whilst walking along a pavement next to a busy road. A stranger, walking towards you, has stepped to the outer side to let you pass. Just give him, or her, a gentle shove with your shoulder – or a hefty shove, it makes no difference really (you'll get away with it either way) – and stand back in 'horror' as the tragedy ensues.
Of course, it follows from this that it could happen to you, at any time. Always pass people on the inside, is my advice.
Don't have nightmares.